Cool Kid

This kid named Balgobin is really cool. I don't know if he is just plain dumb or just acting to be one. How about u read on and tell me...

TEACHER : Why are you late?
KID: Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
KID: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
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TEACHER : Balgobin, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
KID: You told me to do it without using tables!
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TEACHER : Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?
KID: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
KID: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
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TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
KID: "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
Kid: Yesterday you said it's H to O !
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TEACHER : Balgobin, go to the map and find North America.
KID: Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Balgobin !
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TEACHER : Balgobin, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
KID: Me !
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TEACHER : Balgobin, why do you always get so dirty?
KID: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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KID: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER : I think so. What do you want me to write?
KID: Your name on this report card.
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TEACHER : How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
KID: Don't bite any.
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TEACHER : Balgobin, give me a sentence starting with "I".
KID: I is...
TEACHER : No, Balgobin. Always say, "I am."
KID: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
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TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?"
KID: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
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TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree,
but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish
him?"
KID: "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"
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KID: Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
KID: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
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TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !
KID: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.
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TEACHER : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him,what virtue would I be showing?
KID: Brotherly love ?
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TEACHER : Now, Balgobin, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
KID: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER : Balgobin, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
KID: No, teacher, it's the same dog !
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TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
KID: A teacher

Marry A Carrier Woman?

Have you ever wondered how was it like to marry a carrier woman. I mean, of course carrier is good coz when your wife have a good carrier, there is better prospect for the family and of course less burden on the man of the house. But i just came across an interesting comic strip on this which in a way is true as well. Marrying a carrier woman does have its pros and cons..so can you live with it??

Prison VS Work

When you think about the differences between work and prison, maybe prison isn't so bad...
Why do i say so? Well consider the following facts then you tell me what you think?

IN PRISON........You get three FREE meals a day.
AT WORK.........You get a break for 1 meal and you have to PAY for it.

IN PRISON........You get time off (Parole) for good behavior.
AT WORK.........You get rewarded with more work (Overtime) for good behavior

IN PRISON........A guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK.........You must carry around a security card & unlock & open all the doors yourself.

IN PRISON........You can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK..........You get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON.......You get your own toilet.
AT WORK.........You have to share!- huh!

IN PRISON.......They allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK.........You cannot even speak to your family and friends.

IN PRISON.......All expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work required.
AT WORK.........You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from you salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON.......You spend the majority of your time in an 8x10 cell.
AT WORK........You spend most of your time in a 6x8 cubicle.

IN PRISON.......You spend most of your life looking through bars from inside wanting to get out.
AT WORK.........You spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

IN PRISON......There are wardens who are often sadistic.
AT WORK........They are called supervisors.( .. .. ? )

IN PRISON.......You have unlimited time to read e-mail jokes.
AT WORK.........You get fired if you get caught.

Illegal Immigrants

Ok, the word pretty much speaks for itself. These people had been the problem of the government, society and the police. Always coming in the country even though they know that they should not be doing this. When they come in to our country without permission, they start to take away job opportunities, commit crimes and also pose a threat to our loved ones.

Why they are here? Is the real reason they are here because to earn some money or otherwise? We always see them being caught and deported back to their country but they always come back.
Lets look at how they smuggle into the country shall we? I have some nice pictures of their top 5 tactics.

Beginning with number 5 ..
at number 4

staying at number 3
our runner up at number 2

and winner IS...

Expand Mathematical Equation

Remember those times when we had to go for maths classes and everything was boring where you usually slept or let your mind wonder throughout the class?

Then comes the moment of truth when everyone must sit for the big "EXAM". So you burned some midnight oil in hopes that you will pass the paper.

But then, there always seems to be a question too hard to solve. What will you do when you encounter this kind of problem? Well just do what Peter did.

Special High Intensity Training

Have you ever attended a program in your company named "Special High Intensity Training"?
It is normally conducted by the "Departmental Employee Evaluation Programs" and some of the activities in the program include "Employee Attitude Training" and "Basic Understanding Lecture List".
This special program is lead and overseen by a "Director of Intensity Programming" who also have a "Head of Training" to conduct all the training and finally "Boss In General" to streamline everything.
Interested in the program? want to know what its all about? Then read the following Memo to find out.

Caller & Operator

You know that there are times that when u call in to a customer service line and the operator doesn't understand what you are talking? You try and try to explain the situation but he or she still doesn't get your point? Frustrating isn't it?

Or lets put it this way. Imagine that you are the operator and you get this kind of customer who calls in and saying things that u don't understand until u think that the customer is a prank caller.

Hard to imagine? Here is a brief conversation between both of them..

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan? (anyone)

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan ( someone) And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noel Wan ( no one ) was involved in an accident. Noel Wan got injured and now Noel Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.

Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Lee.(sorry)

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

Before and After Marriage

I am sure many of you know as the saying goes, everything were very sweet when it was dating times. However after marriage, things are not as romantic and sweet as before.

There may be some truth in that statement, but i came across a very interesting method they put it. Maybe i shall share with you all on this. Its just a simple conversation between a couple before and after marriage.

Before marriage.....

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: No! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course! Over and over!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: No! Why are you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Every chance I get.
She: Will you hit me?
He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.
She: Darling!

After marriage....
Simply read from bottom to top.